Parent vs. Public Opinion
This little girl will never mentally or expressively develop past a 3 month old baby. What are your thoughts about the situation? What would YOU do if it was your child?
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the archives...
baby names...
I have a peeve about names and name spellings. I'm not the boss of anyone and their name rights, but I do have an opinion and am not afraid to use it ;)
I don't understand the fetish of spelling a name completely different or making up some bizarre one for that kid to "stand out."
How 'bout you teach Chris self-esteem, confidence, and the strength to "stand out" by being a great musician, artist, student, humanitarian, friend, hard worker, etc. instead of making Khrys have to spell/explain his name for everyone he comes in contact with for the REST OF HIS LIFE?
If you find your or your kids name(s) on this list don't get bent out of shape. Hopefully you are confident in yourself to realize that not everyone will agree with you in life and you decided when you picked the name (or chose not to legally change it as an adult) that it doesn't matter what people think because you like it.
Here we go (+ denotes siblings)...
Delaynee (Delaney is okay, delay-nee is not)
Tennley (Ninely and Elevenly)
Brinlie (Brinley, not Brin-LIE)
Kazdan (is this a place in Africa?)
Tomis (Thomas, I'd be fine with Tomas, but MIS)
Chrizelle (gazelle or chorizo)
Pyper (hyper)
Torsten (Torque or some Greek god)
Kassidi (how 'bout Kacity, ppbtsst)
Lessa (pronounced Lisa, looks like Less-uh)
Madyson (cut it with the Y already)
Zada (Zay-duh, Zawe-duh, Zah-duh)
Kloey (Chloe?)
Gracia (Garcia)
Ryleigh (how 'bout Rye Lee, zoinks)
Matisyn (syn/sin)
Blayden (sounds like the Priest from Princess Bride (mawidge) is trying to pronounce a word, but I cannot tell what it is)
Artemis (Greek god or skin rash)
Shithad (shi-thad is how it's pronounced)
Tiara (Fedora or headband)
+
Tavia (labia or saliva)
+
Trinity (the Godhead)
Baelyn (I don't get it)
Chryssy
Shydi (shy-dee)
Brick
Renesmee ;)
Mattelyn (Mattel toys, matte printing)
Brayson (a horse sneezing)
Palabra (abracadabra, Carrabba)
Jaklyn
Hannan (boy)
Jakery (or Jakerie, not sure, but it's a boy)
Cason (boy; like Jason or Cassie, I don't know?)
Kasen (sausage casing)
Bayron (bye-run, not BAY-run like it's spelled)
Alivia (saliva, Olivia, alive-e-uh)
Shandell
Tristan (too 'Legends of the Fall')
Kaydence
Kelton (kelp, Plankton)
Kennedie (ken-eh-DIE?)
Kenidee (just spell it Kennedy already)
Bleigan (blee-gan, girl)
+
Jakery (dakery dock)
BreeAwnna
Laekynn
+
Kiger
+
Breeze
If you're in the market for baby names (if you've already named your child this, it's all good; I'm talking about future born children here), DO NOT name your kid these overused names (including the different spelling variations):
(How do people NOT know these are popular?)
Sophie
Jaden
Addison
Ella
Madison
Kate
Jane
Ava
Connor
Joshua
Isabelle/Isabella/Bella
Emma
Isaac
Olivia
Jacob
Zachary
Kaitlyn
Noah
Emily
Jackson
Aiden
Some of my favs lately...
Joss
Dax
Monte
Benton
Dane
Hugh
Murphy
Stella
Maddox
Jillian
Landon
Mack
Scarlett
Portia
Wade
Lucas
Asher
Finley
Jon
Vivian
Sofia (if you're stuck on Sophie, I like the European spelling)
Davis
Miller (what's with me and last names as first names?)
Some names that should be off-the-market (like retiring a sports jersey number), for obvious reasons...
Jesus
Oprah
Charlton
Whoopi
America
Cher
Madonna
Angelina
LaFawnda
Denzel
Giselle
Crispin
Goldie
Anjelica (the brat from Rugrats)
Cleopatra
Paris
I don't understand the fetish of spelling a name completely different or making up some bizarre one for that kid to "stand out."
How 'bout you teach Chris self-esteem, confidence, and the strength to "stand out" by being a great musician, artist, student, humanitarian, friend, hard worker, etc. instead of making Khrys have to spell/explain his name for everyone he comes in contact with for the REST OF HIS LIFE?
If you find your or your kids name(s) on this list don't get bent out of shape. Hopefully you are confident in yourself to realize that not everyone will agree with you in life and you decided when you picked the name (or chose not to legally change it as an adult) that it doesn't matter what people think because you like it.
Here we go (+ denotes siblings)...
Delaynee (Delaney is okay, delay-nee is not)
Tennley (Ninely and Elevenly)
Brinlie (Brinley, not Brin-LIE)
Kazdan (is this a place in Africa?)
Tomis (Thomas, I'd be fine with Tomas, but MIS)
Chrizelle (gazelle or chorizo)
Pyper (hyper)
Torsten (Torque or some Greek god)
Kassidi (how 'bout Kacity, ppbtsst)
Lessa (pronounced Lisa, looks like Less-uh)
Madyson (cut it with the Y already)
Zada (Zay-duh, Zawe-duh, Zah-duh)
Kloey (Chloe?)
Gracia (Garcia)
Ryleigh (how 'bout Rye Lee, zoinks)
Matisyn (syn/sin)
Blayden (sounds like the Priest from Princess Bride (mawidge) is trying to pronounce a word, but I cannot tell what it is)
Artemis (Greek god or skin rash)
Shithad (shi-thad is how it's pronounced)
Tiara (Fedora or headband)
+
Tavia (labia or saliva)
+
Trinity (the Godhead)
Baelyn (I don't get it)
Chryssy
Shydi (shy-dee)
Brick
Renesmee ;)
Mattelyn (Mattel toys, matte printing)
Brayson (a horse sneezing)
Palabra (abracadabra, Carrabba)
Jaklyn
Hannan (boy)
Jakery (or Jakerie, not sure, but it's a boy)
Cason (boy; like Jason or Cassie, I don't know?)
Kasen (sausage casing)
Bayron (bye-run, not BAY-run like it's spelled)
Alivia (saliva, Olivia, alive-e-uh)
Shandell
Tristan (too 'Legends of the Fall')
Kaydence
Kelton (kelp, Plankton)
Kennedie (ken-eh-DIE?)
Kenidee (just spell it Kennedy already)
Bleigan (blee-gan, girl)
+
Jakery (dakery dock)
BreeAwnna
Laekynn
+
Kiger
+
Breeze
If you're in the market for baby names (if you've already named your child this, it's all good; I'm talking about future born children here), DO NOT name your kid these overused names (including the different spelling variations):
(How do people NOT know these are popular?)
Sophie
Jaden
Addison
Ella
Madison
Kate
Jane
Ava
Connor
Joshua
Isabelle/Isabella/Bella
Emma
Isaac
Olivia
Jacob
Zachary
Kaitlyn
Noah
Emily
Jackson
Aiden
Some of my favs lately...
Joss
Dax
Monte
Benton
Dane
Hugh
Murphy
Stella
Maddox
Jillian
Landon
Mack
Scarlett
Portia
Wade
Lucas
Asher
Finley
Jon
Vivian
Sofia (if you're stuck on Sophie, I like the European spelling)
Davis
Miller (what's with me and last names as first names?)
Some names that should be off-the-market (like retiring a sports jersey number), for obvious reasons...
Jesus
Oprah
Charlton
Whoopi
America
Cher
Madonna
Angelina
LaFawnda
Denzel
Giselle
Crispin
Goldie
Anjelica (the brat from Rugrats)
Cleopatra
Paris
11 comments:
SICK!
When I read about this my exact thoughts were "I am grateful that I am not in a position to have to make such a critical and terribly difficult decision."
I also felt that way when a family member of mine had to make a difficult decision regarding a complicated pregnancy. I felt that way over the whole Terri Schiavo case and I felt that way when I read about several families going overseas to seek treatments from stem cell research.
I agree with C-dub in that I wouldn't want to have to make that decision....but that is the safe answer. On another level, seeing these special children come into the hospital in their teens+ and still have periods, boobs, pubic hair, and bigger bodies to move around, lift, diaper change, etc. I have to say, I don't really blame these parents for the decision they made.
I keep thinking, as morally questionable as it might be, her parents love her. Her parents want to keep her and care for her as long as possible. Who are we to decide that her parents are wrong? Even in the name of disabled rights, aren't they the ones who love her most?
My other argument would be that it would have been impossible for this little girl to make it to her current age without significant medical intervention at every point in her life. Is this just an extension of medical intervention?
As medicine advances, prolonging the lives of all kinds of people with all sorts of complications, what will the ethical implications be of extending life at all costs?
It is obvious to me that these are loving parents who are only thinking of their daughter's quality of life. This procedure has made it possible for her to be cared for by those who love her most and has made it so she can live a somewhat comfortable life. This girl isn't neglected or abused -- only loved and cherished. Don't we all do everything we can to make our child's life the best it possibly can be?
What gets me is that the public is all in uproar over these parents who love and take care of their daughter but what about the abused, neglected and sad children that have horrible parents that don't take care of them. Where's the uproar for those children?
I don't think those parents were being lazy or unethical. As her parents, they have the right to take care of their daughter as best as they see fit. She only had the brain capacity of a 3-month old baby! Someone in the article rebuked them by saying they are taking away her future rights, like maybe she'd want to have sex someday but couldn't now that she had that surgery. Seriously, she can't even lift her head or eat solid foods. I can't even imagine how difficult their decision was to make. I believe they considered everything that was entailed, but felt it was the best for her quality of life. Instead of judging their decision, we should be grateful that we don't have to make that decision ourselves.
LRH--I totally agree with your comment. . .that's what I was thinking. . .at least these parents are there (BOTH of them), and they obviously care for her very much, and want to be able to do so.
I am very uncomfortable with where the line is going to be drawn here. When you read the comments of the hospital's ethics committee chair, he claims the girl is incapable of suffering indignity, which thereby justifies these proceedures. Seems to me people who are incapable of defending their own dignity are the ones most in need of defense.
I cannot imagine facing these decisions, but even that wording implies there was a NEED to make a decision. These are elective surgeries altering her natural development, not standard actions in the developmentally disabled community by a long shot. The family claims to have been shocked by the "uproar", which to me implies that the doctors involved did not do a good job of preparing them or explaining the magnitude of these steps. They published a paper, and should have made clear to the family that this was a new direction in the care of disabled children.
Sorry for such a long comment!!
Just came over after seeing your comment over at Organized Chaos-
I have read some on this family, and completely support them! It's really easy to give our opinion, or to condone people for their actions, but the fact remains that they made a very painful and agonizing decision. I would probably do the same thing in their situation!
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